About time you put rest to your demons...as I have done with mine.

Everyone has a past...I do too. I always admit to being deeply flawed but I choose to run at Jesus' feet and seek sanctification and forgiveness. The sooner you let go of your past, the sooner you will stop giving the devil ideas on what to use against you. Face your past with courage and crush it with current actions of betterment. Remember, Christ takes it on the cross with him when we ask him. All the burden, All the pain , All the tears, All the regret....everything to God in prayer.
Personally,  I do not consider something a mistake if I learnt something from it. I consider it a lesson learnt the hard and best way possible..A lesson learnt through experience. I wish everyone could adapt to this belief..i wish you would all believe in lessons rather than mistakes when it is the case....because then, the devil would have no ways to get back at any of us.
In more than one cases, I've had a friend dating a man who they gave their all to only to discover much later that the man was married. The same actually happened to me but I got a grip of it and I got myself out of the situation. I remember every time I told myself I had to get out of it, the devil kept reminding me that the deed was already done, that the sin was already committed, that I was in too deep already and stopping now was senseless. I was dirty, filthy and trash in my own eyes. I'd never imagined myself, smart as i believed i was,being caught up in such a situation. Oh love, the evil one doesn't give a shit about how smart you think you are. He gives you a reality check that hits you so hard you wake up in a pit. The day I decided to walk away for good...I had prayed about it a lot, I walked away and have never looked back. I walked away from every material luxury known to man and woman especially lol I walked into my freedom both mentally and spiritually. I shed to a new skin. I was basically reborn. Times would be tough I knew, for actions have consequences and I was ready to face mine. With God, I knew I couldn't break, the world wouldn't break me and most certainly, the devil would never break me. This time, I decided to let go of a path formed for me and instead followed a path formed by me. I had to cut the grass on my path, clear the bushes, shrubs and thorns and in doing so, get pricked in the process. But it was definately worth it. I learnt my lesson the hard way but I learnt it either way.
Now the trick is...when you choose to start a fresh, with God being your guidance and your light, you must hit rock bottom aka ground zero for a new beginning. For a new story, the previous has to be erased and a page freshly cleaned so as to be written on...This time permanently by the King. So after this situation, I hit ground zero I was literally and figuratively back in the streets. Not that I'd ever left but you know what i mean. I started my life and retraced my steps from where I'd lost them. I became truthful both to myself and to my God and even to my friends.
The reason I'm writing this publicly is because when i started my blog a few ago, I chose to tell my story...deeply and truthfully for those who may have found themselves in some situations which are relateable to mine. For such people to know that there is hope, for them to know there is forgiveness, for them to never let their pasts or present painful situations define their futures. All this is through God who has seen me through it all. I pray that even if it will touch just one soul not even many, just one....then my work and my story will have been worth the telling.

Blessings and Love,

Nyandia.