CRAZY WEEKEND... RESPONSIBLE FUN

Friday
Got me leaving work late as I was helping bae out with some post grad party planning... On the way home, this lady seated in front of me to the left kept giggling and being the curious one I had to investigate. So this guy was texting her about how he used to steal avocados. That was just hilarious ain't none of my business though lol was so tired but spent the better part of the evening catching up on some GRIMM

Saturday
Day of the party... Personally I wasn't to go but was convinced to after all, it was in a really awesome posh venue. I hadn't been out in almost a year so I figured.. What the hell, what's the worst that could happen anyway. I donned my natural afro and stepped into some 6-inch heels l, a fitting double peplum jacket and pink flowing chiffon dress. Felt great actually. Oh and lipstick... We cannot forget the lipstick at all. We got to the venue and my Goodness I really shouldve brought my own date. Why you ask? I was probably the only Kenyan and the only person who couldn't speak French smh 98%of people at the party were related and I didn't know any of them. I was so thrilled to see some kids I know yes you read that right, children. All this time on my seat as I listened to a French pastor, I was itching as the Brazil-Chile game was on and I didn't want to seem rude by popping in and out of the room so I held my own. My favorite part of the evening came by... The food. Oh my lawd! I was so pissed at myself for cooking and eating at home prior to the event. What was I thinking?!?! I was looking at all the goodies I had longed for but could have. Life can be a bitch sometimes. A few moments later one by one, we were asked to offer a congratulatory message to the lady. Now story for another day but her and I don't meet eye to eye. I just have this chronic condition known as dislike-for-selfrighteous-asses-who-think-they-have more-right-to-God-and-Jesus-than-you-do. You know the people who make being born again seem like such a bore and make Christians look like self righteous holy hypocritical judgemental asses? You get the picture I'm sure. So I just said congrats literally just the word and sat lol. I have no time for pretense life is too short you know.

When they started the dance session I saw that as my que to run and pop some flaming shots... First time in like 3years. It was fun as I got the most amazing company weirdly enough someone I'd just met and she was fun and lovely and out of nowhere we decided to drive out and take our party elsewhere. My goodness it was fun and weird. Our first spot was at Westlands and while we were parking the cars at the basement, some kids had just come from prom from my guess and one had his d*ck literally out. I have no idea what he was doing as he was talking to his pals. My goodness this vice named alcohol... The things it makes people do. Funny part is when he saw us, he ran to our car and shook Christian's hand. I died I swear hahahaha this guy was literally just from God knows doing what to his junk. I gagged. It was an amazing night 3venues later and 3a.m. Into the night... I had to go home, take some painkillers and pray to not have a hangover. Oh how those prayers got me nowhere

Sunday
Midday is precisely the wake up hour. Laundry to do, a house to clean, dishes to wash, shoes to be wiped Jeez!!! And to top it all off I'm pretty sure I had the worst hangover in life's chronicles of alcohol intake. Never again I say... With a smile for I know it's a promise I so much intend to break. Lord have mercy!

Blessings,
Nyandia

LIVING WITH LUPUS

When your health gets taken away and you suffer sometimes unexplainable pain every single day of your life for months amounting to a couple of years, death becomes a reality. Now don’t get me wrong, it is not a battle I have lost or I am planning on losing or something of the sort, it’s just that the lack of health makes you aware of so much and reality hits you in a way such as you’d never imagine. Most actually  nay, all Healthy individuals cannot even begin to comprehend on the reality that we must all die in the end…it is a thought that no one thinks of and to near everyone, it is a thought everyone fears.

I Have faith; faith in God and faith in Humanity. I actually believe I will get well I mean, it cannot get worse lol and hence for now, the battle must be fought and fought hard and well. Weirdly enough there’s so much positive I have learnt and acquired from having this disease, I have seen so many silver linings from this dark cloud that has hovered over my life for the past 4 years now. The pros outdo the cons so this battle is definitely not getting lost. I'll share for anyone out there living with some sort of health issue:

1. Healthy Living

Exercise, I joined a gym to escape the bone pain and muscle stiffness. Also due to the steroids, goodness knows I don’t want to gain super weight as I did the first time. Meals, healthy and glutton-free, fruit salad literally a minimum of three times a week, almost no red-meat meals and plenty of Omega-3 salmon meals. I’m living the life.

2. Healthier relationships

The weird thing is, fake people shed themselves from your life when they see you going through hell. Very few people will be there to hold your hand through the painful physio sessions, very few will even visit your hospital bed and even worse very few will pick your call when you find yourself in a fix. My life was made so much easier.

3. No drinking or weird unnecessary raves

Since I’m literally like always on medication, I don’t drink or smoke and I find myself being more introverted since the day I found out about my health. I save much more money and love myself much more and treat myself better with my money which I could have spent on useless night outs. It’s hilarious but you should see me out for dinner every week….

4. Clean freak

To avoid infections and weird allergies, I find myself washing my hands probably every two hours. I know its obsessive but I love it. My house is spotless lol and I cook my own meals. You get used to this and it’s amazing.

So you see, not everything is bad. There is good that comes out of bad if and when you choose to see it like so. It’s not the end of the world, it’s not the end of my youth and fun…definitely it’s just the beginning for me.

LOVE,

NYANDIA.

Things You Should Never Say

     1.       I Never Meant

Learn to take responsibility. When you mention bad words and hurtful mentions to people when you’re pissed and throwing a bitch fit aka a tantrum, you did have a sane mind so the least you could do is take responsibility and instead of bringing up excuses, apologize and take it back. Don’t claim that you never meant to call him the devil or you never meant to call her a witch. We all know there must be something that triggered you to take it there and when you think about it later, it could be a legit reason. Either way, learn to say you’re sorry, eat your humble pie.

     2.       You’re Useless

Now why in the world would you say this to someone and especially to your partner or even worse, to your Child? Personally, I think you must have some deep issues for these words to leave your tongue. These words wound and they’re both mental and psychological, to some extent even spiritual. They are sort of curses and we all know about those especially when you say them to a child. I have been told these words several times and God knows it took so much strength for me to break out of the mental state I had been put in from childhood of just how much I would amount to nothing. No amount of anger, hurt or scarring should have you ever utter those words to anyone. NONE AT ALL.

     3.       I Love You

Tricky huh? Ok let me hand it to you; When this guy you’ve had your eye on and vice versa buys this expensive gift that you’ve longed for for a while now, the emotions overtake you and you scream ‘I Love You’ #sosad Or when you’ve had sex with someone and you become emotional as some do and through the tears you whisper ‘I Love You’ #sosupersad Avoid this at all cost. Take your time, only as much as needed to tell someone that you do love them. Be sure to mean it and be ready to handle the consequences. Be very smart about it when dealing with this 3-word sentence…it seals fates.

     4.       I Hate You

We all go through that moment when someone greatly disappoints or annoys us and they literally cross that very extremely thin line that lies between love and hate. This doesn’t make it right to yell out at-the-time emotion. Such words can be deeply scarring especially when they come from loved ones and people we deeply care about. Remember that words cannot be taken back and lie engraved in a memory somewhere. Watch it!

     5.       You’re Ugly

Ok, I get the jealous bitch fit that may get thrown your way when someone is jealous or some weird feminine-assumed emotion is going on. But to actually call someone ugly, should let you know how ugly and scarred you are on the inside. Personally such words would never do anything to me but we all know people are different. You may tell that to someone who has deep psychological issues and with a very low self-esteem...don’t be the reason they pushed the button and decided to slit their wrists. Don’t be a mean girl and we all know that mean girls are in both sexes. If a girl rejects you, calm down and take it like a man and move on. Let them see what they’ve missed out on. Don’t make them thank the heavens for the choice they just made.

     6.       I am better than you

Yeah right. Cause you were born wrapped in shimmer and glitter and your star shone and three wise men visited your mother in the delivery room right? If this didn’t happen to you, calm the fuck down...you’re just like the rest of us. Be humble, stay humble and watch God lift you up.

      7.       I Wish I never met you

I’ll not be a hypocrite and lie to you lovies that I have never wished this but I would also be lying that I didn’t sit down and think of the things I learnt from that specific person. There is a reason why your paths crossed in the first place. It is/was never a mistake. Some people are meant to be a blessing while others are meant to be a lesson, always remember that. It is only a mistake if you learnt nothing from it, otherwise it was a lesson.

      8.       I can never Love/Want someone like you

Some people turn us off just by the way they breathe…no need to be coy. It’s a fact that we all have our preferences and we want to attract a certain type of person. But sit down, calm thineself and ask yourself, how so you attracted that person? Be humble and thank God that someone still finds you attractive and worthy you know? Find a nice way to turn down the guy/lady, tell them you’re flattered but you either are in a relationship, you’re not in a position to date or you don’t feel the same way about them. Remember: you do not owe them an explanation well, unless you did lead them on.

IT IS NICE TO BE NICE. BE WISE.

Hello Friends!! Hope your weekend was lovely. Now, in my 22 years on earth, I have met so many different types of people. Some are nice, others are ruthless, some really care while others couldn’t give a thought of you, and some have been changed positively by pain while others swore to revenge and so on and so forth. Basically this is a few ways on how you can be awesome and a blessing to others. Remember, ‘You have not lived until you have done something for someone who will never repay you’

      1.       Street Families cum Random strangers

From the children to the grown-ups. I know, I know, I also have my own reservations about some of these women I see in these Nairobi streets who are as vulgar as can be when you refuse to lend them a few cents. You know what, doesn’t matter; once a week try this: on your way to lunch, pick one of these kids up and take them with you. You have no idea the stories they tell you and they’re as comic as can be. This one time I was walking from the office and saw a gathering of people just outside the entrance of a bank, naturally I never go close to such but this one, I was curious so I took a peek and EVERYONE was staring at the tiny body of a street girl who was either asleep but most probably passed out from so many reasons. I walked away but on a few steps, I went back, shook her awake and asked her what was wrong, basically she ended up my lunch date. Never felt so good in my life and it was fun!

     2.       Your Family

Charity does begin at home. While you’re busy being generous and philanthropic to everyone and anyone yet your Mother or sibling is somewhere struggling for the very basic of necessities, I think you’re cursed. Never forget who was there and who will be there for you through the sometimes merciless world. Sending shopping to Le Mom every month or two couldn’t hurt, even helping out a sibling will go a long way since at one time, you will need them too. Don’t be a show off to workmates and random strangers while your family are literally diving and swimming in the tides of poverty. Be Nice.

     3.       Friends

Don’t always be on the receiving end, be the giver as well. Don’t always be the one waiting for handouts, have some dignity. Take them for lunch, pay for their drinks, and randomly surprise them with weird gifts. See how that makes the relationship grow. Be the person they can rely on, they can go to, they can cry on. Be accommodative and learn to listen not always speaking.

     4.       Your Partner

Girls Girls Girls. I get it with the man taking care of you crap and what not but hey, what if you took care of him every once in a while? How about you pay the bills every once? How about you take the car for service this time? Surprise him at work and take him out or bring him take out and have lunch at his office. Take control of situations at times. Let him know that you can hold your own. Watch the relationship shift from being too much on him and it being fun for the both of you. Watch him want to spend more time with you, spend more on you and even invest in you.

    5.       Workmates

70-80% of your day is spent with these people. You cannot afford to be a mean person. These people know you, they can make you and some can even break you. Be nice, don’t go behind people’s back to talk about them. If you have a problem with someone, might as well go ahead and confront them and get it over with because you’re going to be seeing their face for the long while. Some of their problems should be your problems, learn to shoulder some of their issues with as much weight as you would if they were yours for we all need each other and above all, respect them…it goes a long way.

LOVE,

NYANDIA.

LIST OF ANNOYING THINGS THAT WOMEN/FEMALES/LADIES/GIRLS (I’m sure you get it by now) DO

Now, the members of the clan of Eve are different from the members of the Clan of Adam. Eve members half the time know when they’re being annoying. Half the time, they may actually be annoying you with reason; either, they may want your attention either to talk, listen or hey! They may be just wanting some’ through the perfected art of distraction, they may just be hormonal and just want to get under your skin, well just to mention but a few reasons which are viable. I have compiled a list of annoying things that women do see if it helps you understand the Why’s and When's in regard to they’re just being annoying. 

Now remember, if someone does something and you really don’t appreciate what they’re up to, it’s better to just tell them. You could also learn to tolerate them seeing as people are different. In this case, since you’re dealing with the emotional people, a calm sit down will do just fine but if she is being stubborn; which is what happens in most cases anyway, a firm hand will do. And by that I don’t mean strike, I mean a serious no nonsense straight faced talk. Women love the authority sometimes anyway. Oh, but if she just wants some good loving *wink wink*, better do it else you’ll have no one but yourself to blame for your blue balls for the next few weeks HEHEHE But Girls, don’t take advantage of the fact that Men love everything, well almost everything about you for you to be a pest and annoying cool? Cool.

1. Holier than Thou Attitude

Oh My Golly Gosh!! Where to start. When you want sex, ask for it even better, go get it!! Men love this. Lying in wait like some sort of animal waiting for the mare to come and mount is exhausting; sexually, mentally, psychologically. In my chronicles, women are more sexual than men. So that goddess in you that turns into a harlot in your mind at times, if you don’t reveal it to your man, who will you reveal it to? Another thing, when talking about people, stop always trying to seem like the righteous one...it’s distasteful. Be the bitch every once in a while, speak your mind and rise above your self-limitations, people will respect you for it,

2. Bitching about other Women, Random women

There is honestly something wrong with a woman who cannot compliment another woman. Whether she sees a woman looking hot as hell in some Louboutin shoes or it’s a new hair style, a simple nod will suffice. Sneering and rolling your eyes at a random lady walking down the street just because she has put much effort towards looking good, is in a word PSYCHOTIC. Insecure women do that.

3. Security Issues

If you need your/a man to always tell you how beautiful you are like a couple of times a day for you to actually feel that you’re worth something, you need Jesus among other things. Don’t make a man your emotional crutch. It’s exhausting and unattractive. Have some dignity and pride, every day you wake up, look in the mirror and proclaim how beautiful, blessed and favored you are. Proclaim on how you’re going to conquer the world today and see a big difference in your day to day life. Don’t make a man a god of sorts to you, believe in yourself. Every woman is beautiful in one way or another; I can attest to that. If that wasn’t true, some of these girls in the village of villages with the weirdest naïve habits would never get pregnant and we all know how pregnancy rates are high in those zones.

4. Mother attitude

Stop mothering people. They have mothers and other much older, more mature mother-figures for that. Nagging because of the color of socks your guy/man is wearing is cuckoo. When it’s his stuff, there’s a much better way to approach him but not on such super minor issues. Turning to be a Mom for your man is ugh repelling.

5. Shopping

Yes, I’m going to tread very carefully here as I fall here in all ways and directions. Honestly, MEN HATE SHOPPING it’s a fact and nothing will change that. Don’t make them dread going with you to the mall because he knows what awaits. Especially when you don’t tell him and he just finds himself in a boutique or supermarket, it’s much worse. Just let them know the truth and your real intentions…that way, he knows what he is up for. And don’t push it…it’s not worth the strife. We all have girlfriends for this you know.

6. Non-Stop Talk

45 minutes of endless talk which may or may not include complains and words of hate and spite is the reply you get when you ask most women the very basic and nice caring question of ‘How was your day’ Nobody who comes home from a long day at work likes a teetotaler. I sometimes can’t even stand the noise of my television and the most I want to do is read something, anything, rather than hear human noise. Don’t make people dread asking you questions for the fear of your never ending answers. Keep it basic and straight to the point. Sometimes even though you’ve had a crappy day, put a brave front and say it was good because you may not know how ugly your partner’s day was.

7. Insisting you don’t love them

Don’t get me wrong here, I do know there is a good number of people who really make one feel unappreciated but life is like that. There’s positives and negatives…learn to run with the good and leave the bad. Learn to let go of those who hurt you and make you feel unappreciated and what not…you don’t need those people in your life. Don’t always insist verbally on how much you’re not loved. Sit back, reflect and see if that’s true and if it is, why do you choose to stay? Also, learn not to take everything personally as people are very different and if someone wrongs you, tell them. Remember, if they didn’t love you as they claim, they wouldn’t be there you know? Weigh it all before such utterances that sound so conclusive.

8. Hating on each and every of his friends

This is so not cool. Remember, the guy had a life before he met you and will have a life waaay long after meeting you. Tolerance is key but also there are some of his friends who are horrid nightmares, some who hit on you, text you, say inappropriate things at and/or to you. Tell him. Take the time to know his friends before you judge them, then make your conclusion and involve him as well.

9. Winning arguments by crying

Men don’t do crying, simply because they mostly have no idea how to react or what to do. Taking advantage of this fact is psychotic and very manipulative. One day, he will get tired of this and he will leave or worse, he will just be looking at you and walking out right after telling you that he will only talk to you when you’re ready to be an adult. Be an Adult and learn to handle situations in a similar way, this way you’re both happy and when you happen to cry which won’t be a common view for him, he will take it with utmost seriousness.

10. Never saying Sorry even when they are wrong

Women can be way more egotistic than men. Their pride much more as well. Saying sorry will not make you add or lose weight, it doesn’t make you any more or less of a person, and it doesn’t make you weak. It makes you the bigger, mature responsible person. And trust me, it’s satisfying when it one day hits you that you’re actually capable of saying you’re sorry. As women, sometimes our emotions take the better of us and when provoked, we may say inappropriate and unnecessary things and that’s why it much more important for us to acknowledge when we do wrong and mend the fences. Always remember that.

Hope it helps.

Love and Kisses,

Nyandia.

LIST OF THINGS GUYS DO THAT ARE SUPER ANNOYING

We all know how confused the clan of Adam seems at times but also its good to note that it isn’t always their fault as I’ve noticed. Half the times guys are busy annoying you, they have no idea they are doing it. There are only two things to do about it: Suck it up and be tolerant OR Speak about it! Let them know...would you not prefer the same being done if you were the subject too?

1. Leaving a Trail of Mess

OMG I don’t even know where to start with this…Breathe Nyandia Breathe! From the shoes at the doorstep to the socks along the corridor, pants on the sitting room carpet, shirt on the bedroom floor and tie on the bed. Yes that makes total sense. Naturally, guys are not as neat as women and mostly I believe it is because they’re told so from a very young age. When a Father hears the Mother nagging the son about an unkempt room or hair or dirty socks and pee all over the toilet seat, they tend to side with boy insisting that its ‘in their nature’ This, I believe is totally psychological. I know some male clean and neat freaks out here.

2. Leaving Hair Trails

Wow this according to me is like top of the list of the disgustos I pity and pray for you especially is you use solid bath soaps. The bathroom floor, sink and the bedroom floor at times looks like a female weave pulling session took place. And on the soap, one just can’t help but hope in faith that it isn’t pubic hair that just got into your mouth as you were washing your face.

3. Squeezing Toothpaste from the top

I do not, have never understood and won’t ever understand this. Who squeezes the toothpaste tube from the top surely? It makes zero sense at all, if any. SMH Nyandia sighs

4. Keeping Long Nails

Whether it is toe nails or finger nails, it is disgusting. I don’t know any woman who likes it when her man touches her with those long disgustos. Imagine during foreplay and your fingers take a hike, like aren’t you afraid you may wound your woman and/or worse, infect her cause we all know the sanitary condition of the nails? AND those that grow ONLY the small finger nail? What the Hell? That’s worth a hurl. Don’t do that, just don’t.

5. Grabbing your groin especially in public

Personally I have no problem with this I mean, each to his own right? But I have heard my friends complain about this and they feel embarrassed whenever this takes place. I guess it’s the fear that they may even do it in the presence of guests? Guys, just try to minimize this lol I speak for others

6. Peeing on the Toilet Seat

How bad could you be in your degrees and aims? Even a child honestly knows how to aim. And you know what’s worse, is the fact that you don’t clean up the mess. I mean, if this happens and you’re a slippery slob, why not wipe the seat after you’re done? Exactly what do you stand to loose? Women take this very VERY personally and it’s humiliating and frustrating and can start a World War in your household.

7. Leaving doors open

Cabinets, Closets, Doors, The toilet seat…name it. I don’t exactly understand how hard it is to shut something after opening it, I mean everyone shuts the fridge and main door. This is a terrible habit and may even cause accidents around the house, please try accommodate some good habits guys; for the sake of your children especially the young ones least they run into a door or an open sock cabinet and get hurt. It goes a long way even in teaching them.

8. Finding Rape, FGM and other serious gender cases funny

Trust me, this is among the most unattractive things as a man you can do. As much as you want us to see how not in touch you are with your emotional side, don’t be a jerk and a dick about it. When you make stupid senseless and somewhat funny to your friends sentiments about issues such as rape, it just draws and defines the thin line between love and hate. NOBODY marries such a man. NOBODY wants a future with that. NOBODY can deal with that.

9. Acting like you don’t care when deep down you do

When you mistreat your girl and she has had enough and decides to let you be and goes her own way, the least you could do is apologize. The least you could do is try show that you acknowledge your wrongs. Least you could do is try make up for it. Not doing this is exactly the reason we never take you back even when you come begging accompanied by your village elders. There, now you know it!

10.  For those in the friend zone, introducing your lady friend as your wife, girlfriend, better half, boo, bae, babe, honey, darling, etc.

We DO NOT like that. There’s a reason you’re on the friend zone you know…so, don’t introduce me to a potential mate cum bae cum baby cum hubby cum future father of my children (in my brain) as your girlfriend! It is irritating and annoying as much as you’re trying to mark thine territory smh it isn’t yours to mark!

There you have it. The remake of Tyler Perry’s The Haves and The Have Nots. Cheerful read people!

Love and Kisses,

Nyandia.

Creepy house Agent, Interesting gym hour

Salut Mi  Familia, this woman finally signed up for gym. Well, you know with the health issue making my joints and muscles stiff and inflamed and also giving me a shit load of bone pain... Turns out the only way I can ensure the full use of these parts is by regular exercise. Seeing as I don't live in a campus or anywhere near a field or nice running ground, I chose to join the home gym just across my apartment and talking of support, Le Bae joined me. Four days now and I swear I have a four pack... Photos soon

Saturday found me waking up early at around 6:15 well, early for a weekend all because I wanted to go and be done with my morning work out. Too sad the gym was closed and I headed back home and began my thorough spring Cleaning which took about two hours after which I just sat and lounged in the couch bathing in milk and cookies. Calories my foot!  I heard a knock but I chose to ignore,  I mean who could it be. Ok who am I kidding, ofcourse I knew it was the house agent coming for my rent receipt which I didn't have for some reason... Laziness. After a few minutes I decided to be the bigger man lmfao and went to the door yawning like I'd just gotten home from a whole nights rave. He apologized for waking me up and I was like 'oh, it's you? Couldn't even guess. Oh, and you were trying to call me? Oh well.. Here I am now'. So I told him I didn't have the receipt and he would have to come for it this beginning week and for some reason I'd already picked up the vybe that that wasn't the real legit reason why he was at my door. He went on to say he had thought of calling me the previous evening but had guessed I wouldn't pick up and boy, was he right. TF would I pick a Friday evening call from him for?! *pardon ze french* I let him continue and he went on asking me what I was upto for the day and I lied that I was travelling to see my small brother in high school as it was their school's visiting day, which was true but I wasn't going as I wasn't prepared and my Mom had only let me know the previous day. Guess what the guy says, that I should let him take me.. You shouldve seen my face. Honestly I was shocked, Nay flabbergasted. Is he serious by any chance or was he just pulling my leg?, among other censored statements crossed my mind.

I told him I was sorted on the travels and it was family stuff anyway and he was like, so?  At this point in time, I wanted to burst into laughter out of amazement. Lanes! LANES!! yes I said it. Lanes! I stood at my door, mouth dropped to my chest and waited holding baited breath for the next things he was gonna utter. Oh and he did go on. He asked when I was coming back and I told him probably Sunday evening. He asked me where he should come pick me up. Mouth dropped to my feet now. Such Priapic, Egoistic confidence this was.  I was like Nigga please I'm all good. He started being insistent and I twisted my story into I didn't know when exactly I was gonna be back so there was no need to feed him inconclusive and incorrect information. This manboy had guts. You know what's creepy about the whole thing, this guy definately knows my place so God knows own he can pop in anytime. He also knows I live alone and he has never at any one time found anyone else in the house with me. That gave me shivers just from writing it down.  Anyway, back to take 100 scene 4: I laughed mildly and slapped my knee literally and told him to stop kidding and i would see him the coming week when he was picking my receipt. He gave me a serious face and tried to explain how serious he was and I just shut my door asking him to have a good day. I then dove to my kitchen and picked the largest padlock you guys have ever seen.... Trust me, it cost a fortune and locked that door like it was midnight in stormsview. I almost dragged my couch like I see in the movies against the door to latch it even further but I chose not to.  Smh talk of weird creeps SMH

At around 11a.m I headed out to the gym after ensuring the coast was clear and the creepster wasn't anywhere near line of sight. And dang! Were there some fine souls in there. I couldn't concentrate much as I was conscious of the eyes on me both from females and males. See what people don't get is that, having a slimmer body than most doesn't mean one is any healthier. If only they knew. Some of these looks were harshly judgemental especially when I removed my hoodie and tying it on my waist baring my tummy. Oh lawd!! I decided to leave after an hour and as I was heading out, I was stopped by this 6'4 Nigerian super well built soul. Oh my goodness he was like a flowing stream of water hahahah then as he was engaging me and asking for my number, the bae came and asked to stay in the gym though I was leaving heheheh shoulda seen my grin. Oh well whatever.

Wish you guys would see the stupid grin I have on my face right now.

Kisses,
Nyandia.

Time to change your friends?

Hey good people, been good? So,  I've been bothered by this topic for the past few days and the taunting got worse as I begun unwinding on my past and the many fakes I've shed in the name of friends. Ever heard of the quote,  'I asked God to show me my enemies and I started looking friends' ?  Uh huh same concept.
I made my own list of how I shed the fakes: (Every list is unisexual and applies to both gender) 

1.The ticks

I cannot even begin to fathom on where to start exactly. These are basically those people who hang onto your every word simply because they know you're their ticket to a meal, to coffee, to a drink, to a night out, and even to a taxi.  These are the people who basically suck the luxury out of you. They are your reason for being broke always even though you make a hundred grand per month. These people follow you around like a puppy and would literally suck your toes if you asked. They cling onto you and whenever you're headed out, they follow despite not knowing your direction. You can never ever benefit from such people as they have nothing going on for themselves and if they do, it's only a TGIF event which trust me,  right after they buy you the first drink... Everything else for the rest of the night is on you. Loose the ticks in your life and watch your pockets prosper.

2.The party animals

These are the people whose drinking spree begins at 2p.m. Thursday and ends at 11p.m Sunday. This isn't even the YOLO (You Only Live Once) crowd... Its much much worse. And it is literally every week. Not just on pay week but EVERY week. They are the reason you're unambitious and no matter being a dreamer, you will never be an achiever. These friends believe that life is as random as everyday and they may also be a reason as to why you're constantly broke. They can be the reason your marriage or relationship is in shambles,  the reason why your grades are pathetic and with time, the reason why you ended up pregnant and/or with an incurable STI. Rid yourself of such characters and watch your relationships with the important people in your life progress.

3. The players

What's that they say about show me your friends and I'll tell you your future?  Riiigght. Mmhmm it applies here. There is no way in hell... And heaven that you are much different from the people you choose to be a crowd with. I had a workmate who told me stories of how all his married friends have side dishes whom they cater to and even go on couples exchange affairs with.. (this is where couples meet at a specified secret location known to only them and interchange partners just for sexual gratification) oh yes you read that right. He though, insisted he would never cheat on his wife but guess what he's up to every Friday evening? I leave that to your imagination. Peer pressure happens everywhere at every age even when you think you're in no way vulnerable to such adolescent influences. When your friends talk about how much fun it is to have a young one at the side, trust me you're going to want to taste that forbidden fruit.
Bar your life and time from such friends and see your personal development escalate.

4. The Bitches & Mitches

These Ladies and Gentlemen, are the mouth offs. You know people who have nothing good to say about anyone or anything? You know people who have such an Ill attitude with such tenacious menace that no one likes them? You know those people who criticize your every action and thought? The people who are mean to everyone including beggars and security officers? They fall here. Being nice, doesn't hurt trust me I know. These kinds of people think nay, believe they're better then anyone else and everyone and everything else is beneath and under them. These people believe that they're actually your true friends when they say every negative thing about you and kill your every hope and dream. Rid yourself of these pesky people. First of all, habits are transmissible and if your friends are such, you're heading that road as well.

5. The P2 and Molly Popper

These are the pill poppers. I remember this one time when I was still staying in a hostel, one of my long time friends had become so used to me that she'd ask me to take her to the Pharmacist so she could get emergency contraception aka P2 pills. What killed me was that it was always with a different guy and that's completely buried me was the fact that she was so comfortable as to not hide her whoreish ways. That's when I decided I needed a change. Firstly, every person I know who has ever used emergency contraception, were always so ashamed of their actions and always did so in their own privacy so how far was she from the somehow straight path that she was totally open to doing it with no shame? I decided to shed people with such mannerisms as it really got to me.

6. The Aborters

I am so anti-abortion and have never hidden the fact. I do know that shit happens sometimes but it's not like you were raped or something cause that's the only excusable reason for wanting one according to me. When you were busy humping the brains out of that man cum boy, screaming his name to the top of your lungs that even your weave got entangled and grew edges and making his toes curl, did you not feel pleasure? We're you not sane enough to know the repercussions of not using a condom or some means of contraception? When the excuse is, 'We were so horny that we didn't even have time for foreplay let alone to get strapped' I wanna die cause Imma just say it... You a Hoe. And having sex unstrapped with a boy who you're so sure can't take care of you in-case you got pregnant? I pray for your soul tonight. Even my friends know I immediately and coldly disassociate myself  from aborters. IDGAF

7. The dirty smelly asses

I don't know if you people know this or even know anyone in particular but there are some pretty many, a bit too many anti-shower people in these streets. Yes even Women. I know of a girl and I pray to God she changed who would skip showering even on her period. Yes! I know! I barfed in my mouth as well. To top it all up, she was and still is from what I hear, an expert weed smoker. And my goodness, you should have seen her.. The typical beautiful lightskinned extroverted 5'2 dancer. In a word, HOT. It got so bad after our friendship got too strained that even her lecturers started sending people to tell her to shower and at one time, a staff member did the honors himself. You people need to realize that Cleanliness is next to Godliness and take it seriously.

8. The Bangers aka I just wanna be your BFF 

Oh I am so sure EVERY girl has heard and had this. And to top it all off, was warned by literally each and every of her friends and even relatives from this one. Now see, some of these Males and Females as well are quite sly. There's nothing as convincing as a friend, someone who has been there for you but is of the opposite sex but always insisted they wanted to be a best friend to you and weren't interested in sex or maybe they were but would never push it. By the way, most people who cheat while in relationships, cheat with these 'BFFs'... Just a heads up. When someone gets to know you so well even from the friend zone, they know what buttons to push to get you vulnerable. They know the exact things to do and say to get to your good side and soon your bedside. They know what steps to take in bedding you. These are psychos according to me at least. I mean, they take advantage of every sense you have from physical to mental to emotional and psychological sometimes even spiritual and twist themselves into fitting to your preferred standards of each. Be careful and watch out!  Men,  these Guys that your Girlfriends or wives claim to be their best friend and have been there for them through it all, Watch out!!  And Ladies,  these girls holier than thou that your Men claim to be their Best Friends and have been with them through thick and thin, Watch Out! Remember the saying 'A shoulder to lean on becomes a D to ride on'?  Well it goes both ways darlings. And don't get me wrong,  friend are amazing and a necessity in fact just not opposite sex BFFs

9. The borrowers

I bet we all have that one person we know or couple of people who always send you that self guilt tripping reverse psychology text insisting on how God will bless you all the way to your fourth generation and what an amazing soul you are and how heaven is missing an angel in the name of you then go ahead to state they need money either to take a girlfriend to hospital or to send home or for a new cool pair of jeans or shoe or whatever. Haha!! Bloodsuckers  these are. Now don't get me wrong, we do need a friend indeed when we are the friend in need but don't agree to be misused. Especially when it comes to that person who insist on how they're gonna pay even with interest but never ever pay and you probably bump into them the next day at a restaurant as they're paying for a massage. Please please let's be wise and know who to lend money to, trust me this kind of wisdom will take you a long way.
Oh yeah and especially Men who are used to being *gold dug? Be wise and use your brain. I'm sure you always know of when you're being used.

10. The unambitious ones

These friend are the people whose most ambitious words are 'I can't wait to get married' don't get me wrong, marriage is a holy and amazing institution but only when it is in the right time with the right person and in the right way. See those workmates whose 5year plan still has them working for someone?  Those college classmates who make it known they just want a well paying white collar job? The girls who don't believe they can buy themselves anything and God has to give them a man who will get such as such for them? Those people who are OK with being just comfortable? Yes those ones? Rid of them. I personally cannot and do not stand people with small dreams. It is so demeaning of your God according to me. See now,  the bible says that God,  our father, owns cattle over a thousand Hills. Same same Bible states that we should enjoy the rich of the land. Now tell me, is the rich of the land driving your Toyota 110 all the way till you're 50 when you can now get a Nissan  Sunny? These cars are good cars to drive but, what about the great cars? Who is a supposed to drive the CLS Mercedes? That G10 that's under assembly at this point and time, who's gonna buy it?  Oh I know.. YOU! dare to dream big. Dare to live in a castle. Your God really is that huge and that wealthy and nothing delights him more than sharing what he has with us, his children. Remember, when you hang out with four millionaires, you will be the fifth millionaire. Success, just like Failure is a disease and is transmissible... Pick your friends wisely.

11. The lonely ones

Ugh these people. Oh I'm lonely I need a man. Goodness why can't God give me a man. Please reply my message I'm lonely. Life suckers...leaving you lifeless. Leave me alone! Period. I need people with life, joy, happiness, godliness and full of love in my life and so do you my dear reader. So do you.
Once they suck the drive and oomf out of you, where will that leave you? At the guest of honor table at a self pity party feeling unloved and unworthy. Who can deal with that?

Be wise. Pray to God for the real deal when it comes to friends and watch them grow you as God grows you all.

Blessings and Love

Your friend,

Nyandia.

#Memoirs

Sometimes as i sit on my couch in the evenings and watch TV,  I pause to think or absorb a few things here and there that have happened or I want to happen. I love to day dream and build castles so high up that no man could bring them down. I mean, two years ago I didn't even dream I would be where I am. Of course life is a journey and we may not yet be where we want to be, but hey! We definately aren't where we were yesterday.

I got back to work after a one week sick off and another week leave due to my health hitting a bump. I actually am back with so much fire and zeal that today I actually registered for gym so I can get my muscles back on track and avoid stiffness over my joints and body generally. Most people may not get why I'm super excited but trust me, for me to actually even stretch a hand or walk a mile after what i went through a week ago, oh boy! I'm with the angels praising on that one. I believe that it is always darkest before dawn and that's why even when I'm going through my lowest points in life at the time, I have to praise because  i know something good is coming up, a heavenly and earthly reward. I'm positive like that. I believe and trust that the height of your success is directly proportional to the depth of your falls. So when you're in a pit, praise God for your high is just getting higher and be ready to hit a new high.

We must never give up irregardless of whoever and whatever the situation. I believe what i mean is we should learn to accept what is, let go of what was and have faith on what is to come. That way, we let God's will be over our lives and we all know about his will...It is o lying to give us hope and a future. Remember that God's will can never lead us where his grace will not deliver us. I remember a while back I had a really bad fall out with my Mom and I badly wanted out. See, the base of it all is the fact that as you've read in my previous posts, her In - laws had a major issue with her and put her through hell both literally and figuratively.  And guess who I'm named after? Uh huh the queen herself who did such harm to the family. So I guess the fact that my Dad had been transferred to work in another town, my Mom could only lay out her frustrations and fury on me. So this time it got real bad and I had had enough and was done contemplating suicide so it was time to walk the talk,  or so I thought. Little did I know that my will isn't God's will and God doesn't answer to what you want but rather replies to what you need. We always had prescription pills lying around the house with my Mom's and Bro's Asthma back in the day before they got healed. I downed a total of ten piritons and as scared as i was, my brain told me that what lay in the unknown was much better than what I was going through. I had had it with the beatings, the threats and the insults. The psychological, mental and physical pain was just too much and I had to end it one way or the other. Ten piritons later I felt nothing,  not even sleepy for the fact that piritons are known for their sleep inducing factors...I was more awake than I've ever been smh! I wasn't really mad but I was scared shitless.

That's when a verse came to me 'it is in my weakness that God's greatest strength lies' so if everything I knew about myself, from the curses and insults was true, then that was ok since they were my weakness and that meant that God was strongest there. A calmness took me and I swear it was something I can't explain even to this day. I hope this explains something about why I always insist the greatest gift my parents ever gave me was take me to church and introduce me to God. From a very early age, God destined me for greatness, he knew me waaaay before he formed me in my mother's womb, he loved me even with all my wounds and scars and filth. All I needed was to understand this. And here I was at the tender age of 14: I understood this, I understood God's love, I understood what he meant when he calls it, Eternal.

My lovely people, never give up. God is just a second away from you uttering his name even through a tear, a cry, a thought, a regret, a reminisce and you know what, he knows each of us by name and knew us before he formed us in our Mother's wombs.
God loves you. God cares about you. God sees all you go through. He answers if you listen. Above all, he is your father. Learn to talk to him.

Love and Blessings,

Nyandia

Of Multi - Daters, Players and Male GoldDiggers

Saturday found me in my home town for something I was trying out for and guess what, I managed to get shortlisted! Woohoo! It started raining heavily so I couldn't go home to Le' Folks though I'll be in the area this weekend.

On my drive back to Nairobi, I sat next to one of the girls who I met there and out of the blues we were talking. She asked me to check out a birthday cake on her phone as it was one of her friends birthday and I was like 'sweeeet!' So I asked the name and she told me Freddie lol hahaha I was like, I know the damn guy. Recap.

Late last year after my complete transformation and cleanse on everything, I was judging some auditions at Campus where I met this guy who was also a judge and we got talking. I really have never understood the whole 'Male Model Ego' thing because I really have never been interested so I thought,  let me see. He took my phone and dialled his number saying he was a talent scout and I should join their talent management team and what not and I thought, why not.

After the auditions, I didn't save his number and was ignoring his texts as i was really not interested and didn't want to lead him on. So he called and I was like ok let's chat just so he could get off my case. A few minutes into it,  he had sent me about 20 of his photographs and that's when I street confirming my fears hahah oh the pride and attitude. He also told me he has just started believeing in love at first sight after meeting me. Ugh Most of these photos were shirtless and I guess he basically wanted me to see what I was gonna miss out on if I didn't date him. Boy oh Boy! He is the typical 6'1 guy, dark complexion with outstanding cheekbones but honestly, not my cup of tea even with abs to die for. After all, what are abs for if they aren't accompanied by a brain huh? Don't judge my being mean until you hear the rest of the story.

We continued chatting and like 2 days into it he'd already asked me for a nude pic. You know how they start huh...like it's 11 p.m and they go like 'Send me a Pic of what you're wearing right now'  I didn't ofcourse but he did send me a pic of him in very tiny boxer shorts. I couldn't help but feel sorry for the bloke. I rolled my eyes everytime I got a text from him but atleast he kept my kind off the shit I had just gone through. Onto the first week the guy was super clingy and one time outside my office, he found me with friends and walked towards us into introducing himself as my husband and pecked me. I was so pissed and shocked I couldn't talk and I asked him to never do that again. I personally have no idea why I let him tag along wherever I went but I guess it's never easy to ask someone to go away especially if they refuse to see every sign of you not wanting them. One Friday evening he passed by the office and asked me to accompany him and his friends to his place as he was cooking and I was like 'Why Not?' Free food after all hehehe oh how wrong I was. So he insisted we pass by the supermarket and I picked a Soda for myself which I was gonna pay for. When we got to the pay till, he quickly walked ahead and left me with the shopping which included his personal effects like soaps, tissue etc and I had to pay. Yup, I paid. The nerve of some of these boys!! The following day he sent me a text insisting he needed to print his portfolio so he's give it to some scouting agents and he was borrowing me money claiming some cheque he had had not yet cashed And silly me, I gave him. Don't get me wrong, I did know I was being used, I just felt  sorry for the bloke.

Like a few days after this, he came to my home area mall and asked to meet me and out of courtesy and boredom I did. We went to the food court and ordered only for me to realise I was paying. And while this was happening, he was busy asking me to take photos of him with my phone and tablet. He begged me to take him to my place which I completely declined without a thought. God knows if I took him there, he would have never left especially since he had been asking to spend nights and hinting that he wanted to move in cause apparently he had a fall back with his Uncle whom he lives with. Imagine!! Less than 2 weeks later and he wanted to move in after making me foot every bill and even pay for his personal shopping and give him money all this despite the fact that he is 4 years older than I.

By now I had already started avoiding him as he was nothing to me but a pest and did I mention he started asking me to buy him a smart phone?!! Yup imagine at 20,000 to 30,000 Ksh. Oh Boy!! Lord knows he pulled the final string. I completely stopped talking to him blocking him at every right, left, front, back and center. This guy had the talent of always showing up when I was at lunch even with my friends insisting I buy him takeout. OMG I had it!

Around December last year, he texted me and I would never reply so he started insulting me lol ever heard of 'Don't bite the hands that feeds you?' My reply to him was ' I hope you now get it why you're so unattractive to me'  and it died instantly.

Months later a few weeks ago he called and I dint have his number so he had to say who he was lol and asked me to give him a minute and he was outside my office just to say hi. I had to go see this. He was so ashamed and couldn't even look at me or find words so after a few torturous minuted I head back and soon after I started receiving texts from him begging for forgiveness and asking me to take him back. That was the funniest thing ever. Oh Life and how fair it is. I didn't respond ofcourse.

Back to the start of this story, on my drive back to Nairobi, the girl seated next to me insisted on how this guy had been asking her to be his side chic lol oh life. This was mean of me but I got to my messages log and showed her the texts from the guy and asked her to run the other way. Unless of course she was ready to take care of a boy in nothing but a Man's body.

Basically, boys be careful women do talk and we do meet and we share more than you'll ever imagine. Heard of the quote 'Women are the new Age Men' uh huh watch out!

Love and Laughter,

Nyandia.

" Be so insanely great at what you do that we loose our breaths watching you"

Here i am, seated on my way home. It's going to be a long journey say a 3-4 hour drive. I'm attending some auditions as well as going to see the parents..been what now, around 6 months since last. I woke up feeling energetic, amazing, Blessed and determined to do according to the words of Robin Sharma : " Be so insanely great at what you do that it makes us loose our breaths as we watch you"

I remember every job I've done whether as odd as a weird catwalk or handing out fliers in the mall. I did it with so much zeal even when my body gave up, I still continued and strived to be the best and do the best I could. I remember standing outside Galleria Mall in the suburban Karen and trying to hand fliers to a majority of snobs, insulting people who looked at you like even your own breathing was a bother to them. But I worked best as I knew how and I paid my bills both domestic and medical. This one time I was working at Westgate Mall 8 a.m to 8 p.m Monday to Monday and at one time, the Lupus hit me so bad and my leg swelled and flared up real bad and when I begged for a few hours off to go seek medical attention,  Christine the supervisor said if I left I should go and never come back. I remember running to the washrooms and crying my ass off and almost questioning God. Oh if I could even begin to explain the experience and divine connections I got from my 90days in near hell job, one wouldn't even imagine. I still enjoy the fruits to date.

This one time we held a catwalk at our home place and my friends and i would only make 1000 Ksh after hours of work as it was an evening event. But we did it cause we had to survive. Then came the Karaoke job. Try working in a club at night when you don't even drink or necessarily like the preferred social setting. With time, you end up at the tip of everyone's tongue on how you get your money yet they have no idea what you go through.

My Mom worked on a Salary of 2500Ksh per month under an abusive female boss, pressure and scorn from in laws.  She would walk 3/4 of the way and only take a Matatu when she got close to either work or home so people couldn't talk about us.l and so she could only pay 5 Ksh. I remember her and I being hurdled in one bus standing edge to edge  almost every day for years. Still, she worked and with my Dad saw us through college and even Private University.

Basically Boys and Girls, be it that waitress job, be it hawking goods at the street sides, be it Marketting a drink at a club, be it interactive singing for hours to drunks in the name of Karaoke, be it that weird uniformed job at the local or international mall; be so insanely great at what you do that we loose our breaths by simple watching you. Remember, God sees all and hears all. He counts every tear shed and nothing is ever in vain where he is involved. It is always darkest before dawn and anyway without intense heat and pressure,  we wouldn't have diamonds would we now?

Love and Kisses,

Nyandia

Of God working behind the Scenes..

Yesterday was an unexpectedly amazing day for me. Apart from one of my good friends who happens to be a doctor calling me to let me know he referred someone who happened to be in a bad situation to my blog, I got contacted by two guys who want me to publish a book and/or write for them on their blogs on fashion and what not. Cool, right? God really comes in the unexpected of ways. Oh yeah and Bae also took me to a Spa after which we went for dinner so unexpected...
Today however, I woke up from one of those unexplainable dreams. All I know is that in the dream I was being bullied as grown as i am. I have suffered in the hands of bullies all the way from a very young age up until late campus years where i learnt how to stand up for myself.
I remember in primary school at around 3rd and 4th grade, there was a classmate named Peninah who had it in for me.  Uptil date, I have never come around the reason why. She would literally go lie to the teachers that I insulted her everyday at the playground and for some reason, she always had backup from like 3 to 5 other mean girls. She, however was always the victim and the teachers really always believed. She'd literally go crying and screaming like she was demented claiming at such an early age of like 7 or 8..I'd insult her those weird perverse names you'd only hear with kids from slum areas. Well, I didn't come from better but still, I never did anything she ever claimed..smh things we never forget. One day I was seated quietly eating my lunch which was always leftover meals from the previous night crying; no one ever really wanted to associate with me socially as a child and if they did, they'd face the wrath of the mean girls, when one of my Mom's workmates came to see me and bring me lollipops. The guy adored me as I used to sometimes go with my Mom to work and he intervened and warned the girl. Now, you need to understand that this had gone on for 2 to 3 years before anyone could ever let me my side of the story.

High school wasn't a comfort as well as my popularity based on my name being the same as one of the beloved male teachers and being in the main teams of the hockey (among the best teams in the country ) and football team made it worse. The popularity spread to other schools especially boy schools and soon the older girls had had just about enough. My evenings and nights at the dormitory were hell basically as I couldn't talk without some girls goofing negatively and screaming and hurling insults. It made no sense at all it was horrible and for the longest time, I'd never look up at people as my esteem shrank further into a pit. I did get the hang of it though when just one person asked me to stop taking crap and live my life as supposed.

Campus lol was no easier during my earlier years. I'm not the type who are into attention but I'm the type who get it whether or not I want especially due to my loud and social nature. See now, I'm brought up with no girls and for a part of my life I lived with my Big Bro and Dad and even when with my Mom,  I was timid and she scared me to death as we never ever got along and was quite the harsh disciplinarian. So all my life I never knew how to deal with the members of the Eve Clan...I'd never stayed with any. When I won my first local pageant at Campus, I remember snorts and sneers from a tiny group who thought I was undeserving seeing as it was my first time while others had done it time and time again. Now winning an entire University pageant now got me into more trouble with the older women who for some reason thought I was after their husbands. Coming from a small town, news spread faster than bushfire and anything I did : from falling ill to being seen in a restraint was reported to these wives of mementos of the high society. OMG you should see the men I was supposedly trying to fish, you'd hurl I swear! Get the bald, fat drinkers with huge pot bellies and all sweaty? Uh huh oh and like a hundred years older than I. About this time is when I decided to stand up for myself. When one took it too far as to have her friend sneak her my files from the Hospital I attended daily as the Lupus had just hit. That day, I snapped and threatened to have her fired as that goes against anything medical practitioners stand for.

Basically,  standing up for yourself is something no one will ever give you a lesson on. But you know the funny thing about Bullies, they never go far. Trust me, I've seen it and even worse they always end up working for those they bullied. Life is fair like that. Ever heard of Karma? Oh yes she applies heavily here. And even God, he sees and hears it all. Nothing is ever in vain when it comes to him and in one way or another, he fights your battles even if it is years later...you will see he was never asleep when you cried yourself to sleep. All of the above people, trust me don't have much going on right now and when we meet, it's hard to notice the shame and bows of embarrassment even when I take them out for lunch or coffee...yes.

Life is fair like that.  The Author and Finisher of your faith, fights in three background for you and though you may not see it during the storm, when it clears...you understand he was working tirelessly behind the scenes.

Blessings and Love,

Nyandia.

Memories back then...

August 8th, 1997,  my youngest brother was born...I was fascinated cause I'd always hurdle on my Mom's belly and talk to him...how I'd take him to school, sing him to sleep, play and laugh with him and oh yes it all came to pass. So when one day I was playing as i was just 6 years old at the time, I woke up the infant and my Mom whacked my behind and sent me to sleep. When I woke up, My Mom was gone.

Just like that, my parents has separated. Nothing made sense oh wait, it all made sense now. I remembered the arguments and the frequent visits by my Dad's folks and brothers...I remember once my Grandad and GrandMa had come on their usual visits and I remember him shouting ,'I disown you!' to my Mom. At the time, it never made sense but now...It all did. Children are cursed with a memory of not forgetting traumas they undergo at their early life stages to the detail actually. I didn't so much understand why my Mom's in laws had so much despise for her yet she was the calm chill skinny beautiful woman. Guess what the reason was...she was born poor. The hell!! Yes. I remember going to granny's with my other cousins and My Big Bro and I would be asked to get out of the photos when we all wanted to take pics either on or beside myGrandad's motorbike. I never understood why. I remember the other people sitting in high tables feasting to chicken and chapatis literally dining in milk and honey but my Mom, Bro and I were always seated on grass. My Dad's brothers, their wives and children wee treated like royalty but us...We were the paupers....children whose mistake was being born to a Mom from a cow dung house.  To top it all up, of all the children born to my grandparents cause my Dad are boys only, my Dad is the eldest. The one who's supposed to be the most respected in all world cultures, the one everyone looked upto and came to for school fees that even we (Mom, Bro and I) lacked. I remembered every detail and still do and it now made total sense. My Mom took my small Bro with her and went to her Mom's as she was chased out of her own house, out of her own home and away from her children.  I do not want to talk about my Dad in this as he was and still is the chilled patient type who rarely say much. Staying with Dad was fun honestly as there's much freedom and weirdness going around though we were doing badly especially clothes wise. I would go with him to school as he is a teacher and would sit in his classes during weekends or would go to a certain family and stay with them as they were very close.

Now the joke is, at the age of 21...I went through something relative. My then boyfriend had a complication and needed open heart surgery. I was doing pretty bad healthwise as well due to the Lupus as it had gone internal and caused me Severe Chronic Collitis. I suffered in silence as i didn't want to make it about me. I would take a cab from home at 6 so I'd be by his bed when he called by 6:30 a.m and left sometimes late in the night at 11 at the same time admitting myself and discharging myself from hospital. His Dad HATED me and took every opportunity to show me and others including the doctors and nurses. One time just as he left the ICU, he started shouting to the nurses to not let me in saying I was competing with them. One time he couldn't stomach my presence and he shouted at me outside his hospital room saying all sorts of things and insisting I basically go to hell as i was not of their tribe and class. I called my Mom and told her everything as i cried and I could hear all the memories rush back. She cried and asked to talk to him and I told her I'd left the hospital...she asked me to tell him in her words, 'Let him know, that having money, isn't touching God. I isn't seeing the face of God' oh yes she couldn't imagine me going through what she went through all those years ago. Weird thing is, the owner of the hospital and Co-CEO refused to talk to the parents and at once asked them to leave as he and other cardiologists saw what was going on. I'm the one who had taken him for all check ups, all echos, all appointment, booked him in hospital, sat for hours outside the O.R. waiting until the surgery was done...They were the busy type. I have never known parents too busy to take a few hours off take their child to hospital especially in such a serious case. If my Mom read this,  which I am sure she will soon, she would cry.
God got me out of that relationship though it hurt like hell. The guy cheated once he was discharged lol yup couldn't imagine waiting for months to heal so he could be active again. I told everything to my Mom and this is one of the things that actually made us closer as she was the only one who truly understood what i was going through.

Once out of those mucky waters, I decided to love Myself and concentrate on my career and Oh Boy! Did God open doors and still is.

Basically...For those reading this who have just had children or gotten married since 98% of my friends fall here...please watch it! Men, protect your wives and Wives, speak up for your children cause we the Children end up with emotional, mental and psychological scars that take decades to heal. I would know. Remember, your children grow to be like you and in most cases end up making the same choices and decisions you made as they remember them. Be strong and do what's right by yourselves, by your children and above all, By God.  I always say the best thing my Parents ever did for me wasn't give me an education...It was introduce me to God and the Church.

Fathers, your sons will grow to be like you. Is that a good thing or a scary thing.

Blessings and Love,

Nyandia.

Pulling Up Your Stakes and Moving On

It's Sunday again!!! For some reason, Sundays excite me. I love going to church for one then lunch out, probably a movie thereafter followed by some shopping. Past 5 Sundays haven't been that good to me, well not with the meds change and reactions to them. Can't wait to get back to my Sunday schedule like for real. For all ya'll who went, say a prayer for me lol and for all ya'll who didn't go...God is seeing you and so is your Mom lol

It also happens to be Madaraka Day in my Country: The day Kenya attained independence and being a Sunday well the holiday got moved to Monday so imagine the excitement. Times like this I wish I owned a bar lol oh the profits! Focus Nyandia!!

I'm going to share an amazing newsletter I got from Joel Osteen called 'Pulling up your stakes and moving on'

“I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
(Philippians 3:14, ESV)

Are there some tent stakes in your life that you need to pull up so you can press forward? Maybe you’ve stopped in a temporary place, and it’s time to keep going. Maybe you’ve gotten comfortable and decided that your dreams are never going to come to pass. Your health is never going to improve. I’m asking you to pack up your tent, gather up your belongings and start moving forward. You may have taken a temporary delay, but that’s okay. That didn’t stop your destiny. Today can be your new beginning. God is breathing new life into your spirit. He has greater victories in front of you!

Remember, the first place we lose the battle is in our own thinking. If you don’t think you can be successful, then you never will be. If you don’t think you can overcome the past, meet the right person or accomplish your dreams, then you’ll get stuck right where you are. You’ve got to change your thinking. God said no good thing would He withhold because you walk uprightly. Get rid of a negative, defeated mentality. Make room in your thinking for the new thing God wants to do, pull up your stakes and let God lead you in to your promised land!

Love and Blessings,

Nyandia.